I have plenty of friends who have disowned their own parents. I’m almost 40–and although I am extremely close to mine, some of my closest friends felt their parents were abusive and toxic. My husband’s parents died without him by their sides and he was happy to hear is father died. His mother, whom he loved, died alone while he worked overseas. My own paternal grandmother, a wealthy matriarch with every traditional “blessing” a woman could receive, disowned one of her sons over money. The other two were never themselves around her, because they needed their inheritance. You don’t own your children, they are free to grow up and chose to not know you anymore. They are free to pretend in front of you, out of financial fear. There is zero guarantee you will always have your children and zero guarantee they will grow up to like you. But whatever you need to tell yourself.